Monday, January 26, 2009


I just realized I disappointed myself tonight…and in more ways than one.

There is only so much I can blame on NYC, and the other part, I really have to be accountable for.

My inner strength is being pushed beyond any limit I thought I had. When life appears to be fun and games, that’s when you know it’s actually not.

This blog confession is a little selfish. First of all, we should all set realistic expectations for ourselves. If you fall below those, especially intentionally, that’s when you need to look inward and see why you broke down. I’m being selfish for two reasons. Sometimes I don’t think people see my humanity. And I get that. But I want to be accountable, and not let myself slip to this level of discontent. On the other hand, I’m only human, and there is a wit’s end.

I see the end, and I refuse to go there. Therein lies my strength and confidence.

Honestly, I write this post because I know I’m not the only one who feels this way.


Having a guilt ridden “I am a shallow bottom feeder and everyone knows I’m a fake” moment? Awe. Poor Mar. People see what you project, dearest. Ask Julia, you created your own image. Your “humanity”? Good lord. Do you READ your own blog?

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