Monday, January 26, 2009
I love Mary. Yes, that’s right, I love her. And yes, I can love her and sometimes clash with her. That’s what real friendships are like. You take the good - like this - with the bad - like this.
I don’t trashtalk behind people’s backs. If I have something to say, I say it out loud, to their face, or right here, on this website. In fact, I sometimes get in trouble for it.
Mary, Meghan and I are real friends. That means we’re not perfect, we don’t like EVERYTHING about each other, and that’s normal! What we have is a sister-like love, which transcends any daily difficulties. We have issues, we work through them. We don’t always make the perfect decisions, but we try hard to be good people, and good friends. And if we fuck up? We admit that too, and we ask for forgiveness.
Mary’s the FIRST to admit she can be bitchy as all hell. Her temper and mood swings are legendary. She can be critical and holds several citywide records for obduracy, which is impressive, especially in New York. But I’m the first to admit that I can be bossy and loud and overbearing. I’m the pushy stagemom. Also, I’m rarely, if ever, on time to anything, which drives everyone, especially Mary, nuts. (As it should! Bad JA. BAD.)
Mary spells everything wrong, but the girl gets shit done, whereas I’m a procrastinator and a bit of a dreamer. People have described me (accurately) as “flakey” - I tend to double and triple book myself and zone out and totally miss appointments, whereas she’s reliable and dependable and does things when she says she will.
And Miss Meghan, while being one of the sweetest people I know, is also a massive procrastinator, due to her perfectionist tendencies. Plus, she’s a pleaser, which means that you never know what she’s really thinking. At least with Mary you know where you stand. It’s like, if she’s pissed at you, you fucking know it. It’s in your face. Meghan could want to murder you and she’d still smile and nod and you’d walk away thinking she was your bff.
What I’ve just written is quite forthright, but it’s honest - and the goal was always for people to really get to know us. I find that - contrary to popular internet belief - people don’t USUALLY hate us in person ;) (Although I’m going to have to make an exception for ex boyfriends, but I feel that’s a justifiable exception, you know?)
Throughout my life, I’ve always been blessed to have amazing girl friends, and I’ve worked hard at maintaining those relationships over the years. But my relationship with Meghan and Mary transcends friendship - we’re business partners, co-hosts, and career planners for each other. We are each other’s PR reps, confidantes, confessionals, and personal advice columnists. We’re sometimes each other’s dates! And anyone who knows us, knows we’re each other’s biggest cheerleaders. We have a shorthand, a comfort level and a depth that can weather a hell of a lot, including disagreements, and even full out screaming matches (yep, we’ve had them).
I use the term sisters quite often, although, not ever having had one, maybe I’m being presumptuous. I don’t think so, though. A sister, to me, is someone you love unconditionally. You may not always agree with her choices, you may sometimes wish she would do this or that differently, you may want to defenestrate her (on occasion) - but you love her, really really really love her. And no matter what, you would do anything for her.
I wish I had more friendships like this. I wish we all did.
I look forward to less costumes in the new year :)
Love you bunny.